The Facial Shrine

Wifey was one of the first women I became aware of on the internet – this would be around 1996 or so – when she used to upload her pics to usenet groups. She still holds a special place in my heart pants. In this update, Wifey goes low rent and has dirty sex in a cheap hotel.

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Oh. My. God. Nobody can fill out a teddy like this woman.

Something about a seedy hotel really gets me hot and bothered! After heading over to a local porn shop to pick up some slutty outfits and a few dildoes and toys, we headed over to a little motel where I got to show off all my new goodies Do you like my new teddy? Felt like my huge boobs were going to pop right out of it (which they soon did- right into my husband’s mouth, lol). I got up and rode his cock and got to climax twice. He got so hot he literally showered my face and hair with a heavy load. I HAD to cum again after that, with his sticky wad all over my face. Damn it was nasty!

If you’ve never experienced this woman, you ARE missing out. She was one of the first hardcore cumsluts to put her life on-line, and (to me) she’s still the hottest thing to take a load on her face. Wifey always puts on a great show

Link: Wifeysworld – Over eight years of facials from the web’s hottest cumslut.

That pretty well sums things up. This dirty piece of work tongues for oil from a hairy black ass before sucking his cock and taking an open-mouth facial. Hey, if you’ve never had your bung tickled by a wet tongue – you’re missing out. After taking the shot to her mouth, the poor horny bitch wraps her lips around his asshole and sucks in a game attempt to get some return attention.

She fails. Screen caps courtesy of Kiss My Crack.

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I admit that ass licking and rimming aren’t everyday kinks – they’re best left for those exceptionally drunk and dirty moments. Kiss My Crack belongs to a network of over fifty adult sites, with full access memberships that start at one dollar. That’s right – a buck.

Join Now For One Dollar

I thought I’d close out July with something a little different, and this is just plain weird. With cute young women crawling around on their knees demonstrating their oral sex skills on hard candy pops, Lollypop Blowjobs has a strange erotic appeal. A perfect site for people who like to watch cute young women using their mouths – without having to stare at some guy’s dick.

Screen caps from Nada’s video. Click to enlarge.

See More Teens Sucking & Licking Lollypops

I particularly like the yogourt facials the girls get at the end of their videos. Nice touch.

Link: If Willy Wonka Ran A Porn Site, This Is What You’d Get

Its Tuesday. Its fucking 100 degrees. Canadian Tire just double billed my credit card. I feel like killing someone – but I won’t. Instead, I’m going to post some sick shit. I hope you’ve already ate your dinner…

Seeing that its so fucking hot and I’ve been sitting on my ass all day, I got to thinking that I wouldn’t mind having some bitch suck the little nubbins out of my ass hair. These whores would fit the bill nicely.

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These girls are available at Eat Some Ass. You have to admit that the site has a great name – and they’ve got great content, as well. But whether the girls enjoy it or not, they all end up with their tongues buried deep inside hairy ass and huge loads of cum on their faces.

Porn is meant to be dirty, dammit!

Watch Preview Movies at Eat Some Ass

If you’ve never had a horny bitch slide her slippery mouth eel up your ass while giving you a blowjob or handjob, you, my friend, are missing out on an electrifying experience. Not so long ago (in dog years) I had a girlfriend who would dig in and toss my salad for hours. Fucking incredible sensation – and that chick was on the receiving end of many a massive cumshot. The woman was a fantastic nut-drainer.

Up until recently, ass-licking videos were a rare commodity. Every now and then you’d see a bit of bung-tonguing, but there weren’t any large, high-quality sites dedicated to this nastiest of pleasure. There has been a couple of sites that caught my attention, but none that really turned my crank until now.

Eat Some Ass has gorgeous porn chicks doing the unthinkable – tongue fucking hairy-man asshole. I mean burying their faces right in the crack and tasting lower intestines. These sluts are dirty!

I’ve got a clip of Angela Stone trying to breathe with her head right up some guy’s anus. Left click to watch. Your movie player will open and the clip will buffer for a couple of seconds before it starts.

Movie clip of Angela Stone tongue-fucking asshole

Here’s the scoop on this dirty wench:

Oh My Lord. Angela Stone is the filthiest slut we’ve ever had in front of the lens here at Eat Some Ass – not only does Angela fucking live to gargle cock, and not only does she chow this guy’s cornhole like she’s in a pie eating contest at the state fair – Angela gets so turned on by this nasty shit that she SQUIRTED cum out of her pussy MULTIPLE TIMES.

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And yes, they get cum blasted on their filthy faces after doing the dirty deed.

Along with Eat Some Ass, you’ll also get access to Spunk Mouth, Jizz On My Glasses, and Handjob TV. All four sites are made by the same group of people, and Spunk Mouth and JOMG have both been around for years and have hundreds of hours of explosive facial videos.

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It should be obvious that I’m a big fan of internet porn. Actually, I like ALL KINDS of smut, and there are times when I get a desire to see some porn from the edge. Something a little different from mainstream fucking and sucking. I was surfing for shemale porn – more for curiousity’s sake than anything else (ahem) – and stumbled across this Lady Boy Crush site.

This gorgeous Asian “girl” sucking cock has a dick. You’ve been warned. Click a thumbnail to view large version.

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I’m not going to get into the whole Lady Boy phenomenon (that’s what Google is for), but these young Thai men are pretty fucking hot (I can”t believe I typed “hot” and “men” in the same sentence) – nothing like the hairy beasts that pass themselves off as women I usually come across in my travels. Assuming they kept their pants on, I don’t think I’d have any trouble letting one of these hot Asian freaks suck my dick…

Chicks with dicks might as well be cute.

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A new twenty second movie today with dumb blonde Marylin getting slapped around, face-fucked, and taking a load of cum on her cheek, courtesy of Smack That Slut. Marylin – like all the girls at Smack That Slut – like to be tossed around and dick-slapped while sucking cock.

Watch video of more girls getting dick slapped

WARNING : While still sick as hell, this gallery is not quite as offensive as it may initially appear.

While getting a blowjob its good to mix things up a bit. Instead of having her just suck your cock, pull her head off your cock and guide her to your balls. After a bit of hesitant licking, tell her to suck on them – gently – one at a time them both at once. Direct her lower, to just underneath your balls. While she licks your very sensitive perineum, thrust your hips gently. Encourage her with moans of pleasure and gentle downward pressure with your hand. If her tongue doesn’t stray when your asshole gets close, and she’s willing to flick it over your tight puckered hole, why not roll over and make her eat applesauce out of your ass?

If you’re not offended by close-ups off hairy man-ass, click the pics to enlarge.

Relax Its Only Applesauce – Click Here For The Movie

Its only applesauce, so don’t freak out.

When you’re going for the total oral experience, you need to feel the bitch’s tongue up your ass. Nothing quite says “slut” like a good rim job, and Kiss My Crack is packed with movies with girls that go all the way down and in. Once you’ve had it, you won’t want to live without it…

According to respected news source The Onion, the blowjobless rate in the United States has hit an all-time high. From Labor Secretary Elaine Chao:

“Cutbacks in oral services have left 55 million Americans unsatisfied,” Chao said. “Although June saw a promising jump in the age 15-19 demographic, with many teenagers finding summer blowjobs, almost 82 percent of married men are completely blowjobless.”

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While this is indeed distressing news, you may rest assured that The Facial Shrine will be doing its part to help Americans get through these troubled, blowjobless times. We’ve enlisted the services of a number of qualified blowjob specialists who will be available 24/7 to provide oral assistance to those of you in immediate need.

To decrease your chance of becoming blowjobless, consider increasing penis size or improving sperm production.

A QUALIFIED BLOWJOB SPECIALIST IS STANDING BY!

OUR LADIES ARE AVAILABLE 24/7 FOR YOU – CLICK NOW!

“You have just found the hottest site for blowjob and oral lovers. See cute girls sucking huge dicks! Our girls love to give head!” In my mind, there’s no better way to start off a site than with those words. Suck That Dick was designed and brought to my attention by my buddy Blueface (not his real name ) who has a long-standing rep as an outstanding site designer.

This has got to be one of the more attractive sites I’ve visited recently. Its so nice, that I’m considering ripping off it off. Just joking about the theft crack. He HAS done a great job, though, and managed to pack it to the gills with more than 6,000 movies and over 700,000 pictures. Obviously they’re not all blowjob pics, but a little variety never hurt anyone. Personally, I’m kinda fond of lesbian ass licking when I get tired of blowjobs.

Link : Suck That Dick

Other sites by Blueface include: Messy Facials, Neighbourhood Sluts, and Outdoor Porn.